:)

So I'm completely falling head over heals for someone I've known a week...I cannot believe how I feel about Billy. He just asked me to tell him what's going on in my head...this is what I came up with.


How do I feel about Bill?? Well, as you know I’m not the greatest with
words but this is my attempt to make some sort of sense of how I am
feeling inside. First of all I cannot believe I’ve known you less than a
week. I feel like you are my friend…a close friend. Lying next to you
last night was the most comfortable I have been in a very long time. I
felt happy. I felt safe. I felt peace. I want you to know about all
aspects of my life. I want to create experiences with you. I want to
laugh with you. I want to listen to your stories and giggle in my head
when you get off track and can’t remember where you were going with a
thought. I want to hold your hand. You give me butterflies when we kiss.
I smile when you pop into my head (which is often). I miss you right
now. I like the way you look at me. I like that you call me on my
bullshit and crack jokes with me (and at me). I like that we are so
different and yet share many things in common. You make me want to be in
a relationship (I haven’t been interested in sharing my life with someone
in years). You make me want to be a better person (I really do mean
that…with my career, my family, my health, my heart, my brain). Speaking
of brains I like yours a lot. I would be generally upset if this ended
tomorrow (I got that weird little knot thing in my throat right now
thinking about that). I feel vulnerable with you (that scares me…and I’m
okay with it). I like that you texted my mom (ass). I like you…a lot.

6 1/2 hours on the phone...really?

So I spent a total of 6 1/2 hours on the phone with Billy yesterday. How on earth does that happen? I learned so much about him. We have a lot in common. He's incredibly funny. He would have to have an extra eye or something when we met for me to not be crazy about him. He's interesting and interested. He would ask questions.

Oh my...so he just texted and we just had the hottest sexting conversation I have ever had. I need to go take care of a few things.

I like to keep it complicated...

So I went out with Dan on Saturday. We had lunch and a drink at Kona Grill. He's so goofy. Cute. Well off. But recently ended a relationship...this I believe will prove to be an issue.

I went out with Mark last night. I'm such a retard. We went to dinner then had a few drinks at the bar in his building. I sort of started to miss him when I was with him. He's back in a better place and seems to be positive. But of course now he's dating someone else. Oh I forgot to mention we had sex...a lot of sex. It was incredible. I mean really really really great. I don't think I've ever felt the way he made me feel last night (and this morning). Now I have no idea what's going on. He told me he loves me and misses me. He wants to go on vaycay in July. I have no idea what to think. My roommate told me not to bother with him...she said everything seems great now because it's been a while...but that he'll go back to his old ways. We shall see.

So I had to most awesome phone conversation with a man named Billy today. We literally were on the phone for three hours. I can't think of the last person I spent three hours on the phone with. He seems like the type of guy that likes to settle down...I like that...I think.

Eh...

So I went out with Dr. Oscar last night. Not real sure how I feel about the date. I mean it was totally comfortable and everything...but not really sure. He's 42...and you can tell he's 42. He's incredibly handsome. But I feel like maybe there's a disconnect between us. I really think I'm just too young for him. We decided we are going to do it again...so we shall see. I just feel a little odd because I feel like he's at the same point in his life that my dad will be in a year or two. What I mean by that is he was divorced about 2 years ago. His wife had a midlife crisis. She cheated on him a couple of times. I don't know he just seems so freakin nice I can't imagine why anyone would screw things up with him.

We'll see.

I may go out with Dan this afternoon.

Date night.

So I went out with Jeremy last night for his birthday. Got shitty. Picked up the tab. I never do that. I had a great time. We both crashed when we got back to his place. We were total messes of shit. Fun.

I have a date tonight with Dr. Oscar. We met on match. We've been chatting it up for a couple of weeks now. We have good conversation. He's well educated and speaks well. Major turn on. He's a bit older...he's 40 (I think). He has two kids...joint custody. I really have no idea what to expect tonight. I'm sort of freakin out about what to wear...part of me thinks keep it casual but nice...jeans and a blazer. Part of me says dress it up with a nice dress...but that's more of a second date wow kind of thing...We'll see.

I'm possibly meeting up with Dan the man tomorrow for a few afternoon drinks. Dan is just coming out of a relationship. I doubt he's ready to really start dating. But I'm interested in at least meeting him.

Okay that's all I gots for now.

So Hardrock came over last night. We watched a movie. Hung out. We hooked up. It was fun.

Mark changed his relationship status on facebook to in a relationship with the woman he swears he's not sleeping with. I was in shock for a minute. Then I was happy for him. I hope she makes him happy.

I went out with a bunch of girl friend that I hadn't seen in ages the other night. They're all married. Seriously I'm the only single 27 year old woman left on the planet.

Can't sleep...time to chat

Ugh it's 4:30 in the a.m. and I've been sitting here for an hour not being able to sleep.

So I had a wonderful man day yesterday. Hard Rock Tim called while I was out looking for an apartment. He asked if I wanted to do breakfast. I accepted. We went and had some food. It was fun. He's really cute. He wanted me to sit next to him while we ate (he said because he doesn't like someone looking at him while he eats...kind of odd). So I sat next to him. He kept touching me and being cute. He's fun.

Then I had lunch with a guy named David (met him on match.com). He's a really sweet guy. He doesn't have all his ducks in a row but he's working on it. He's incredibly handsome. He's very kind. You can tell he has a big heart. He's 100% relationship material. Lunch went well. He wants to get together again. I think I'm going to. I don't think he would put up with me dating more than one dood. Okay so his baggage. He's divorced. But that's not really baggage because I don't really care about that. He says him and his ex don't have bad feelings towards one another. I believe him. He's back in school and owns his own company...with his dad. Okay the kicker...he lives with his parents. Not really sure how I feel about that. I mean this would force us to take things slow which would be a different pace. Who knows where this will end up.

So I found a new condo today that I'm going to be leasing for a year. The owner is freakin sexy. I need to get that right out of my head.

So I've been chatting with Mr. Dan all day today. He's going through a break up. He hasn't said that but I'm pretty sure it was pretty recent. Bummer. I seems pretty freakin awesome.

Canceled a date with Mario. He never got back with me I'm assuming that screwed that up.

Tim called when he got to work.

Jeremy called on lunch and then never called back. He's so freakin flakey.

Firefighter Aaron wants to get together this weekend...I can't.

Mark told me he's been seeing someone. The last time they were together was 2 weeks ago. He says they haven't slept together. I'm not sure I believe him. Not like I really care. He said he still wants me in his life and thinks we have a deep connection. I asked him later if he wanted to get together. (Jeremy is calling right now...I'm not going to pick up) He said he's spent he'd been at boot camp. I'm just shaking my head laughing right now.

match.com

I signed up to another dating site this week. I think I'm addicted. Or maybe I just like being social. Who knows.

I met Tim from match for lunch on Tuesday. He's freakin hot. But I'm pretty sure he just wants a physical thing. Not that I'm opposed to that. I went to his place yesterday and we played at the pool. He called last night but I was out with Joey.

I went out with Daddy Joey last night for dinner. He's really cute. I like him. But he has a son...but he only hangs out when Gage is with his ex. We had a fun time. We kind of fooled around a bit. His penis is gorgeous. I think I would like to have sex with him. We shall see.

So

My parents got a divorce. wtf. No idea how I feel about marriage anyway...so this just sort of makes me feel like everything is doomed from the get go.

I've been chatting it up with Jeremy all week. He asked me to go to a wedding with him in a few weeks in North Carolina. I think I'm going to go. We may hangout tonight. Not sure.

Had my cards read yesterday. The lady said that my man is going to be very smart. Good with numbers. Reasonable. But passionate...in the bedroom. Yes please. Now where the fuck is this man?!

And I'm back

So I've been on location for the past month and haven't really been doing much dating. Just working.

In the past month several things have happened on the man front. I've basically stopped talking to all the boys. I think I'm over the multiple dating not really getting to know anyone bull shit. All though give me a week and things may change.

Breakfast/Hard Rock Robert is moving to Orlando. I don't feel like trying to get to know someone who is an hour and a half away so he's out of the mix. We were supposed to get together last weekend but I forgot to call him and his stubborn ass didn't call me. So I'm pretty sure that's how it's going to end.

Mark is a total mess of shit. He has serious psychological problems with his image. He's really trying to make things right between the two of us but I really don't think there is anything there. We went out the other night to see a movie and grab dinner. Just nothing there.

Hooman is a goner. He called while I was out of town. I said I'd call him when I got back. I haven't called yet. Doubt I will.

David is a goner. We were supposed to get together Sunday (the only day he can ever do anything because crap fills the other days of his life). My sister came into town and we went condo shopping. I never called David when we were finished. I forgot. He's out.

Firefighter yummy man Aaron texted me while I was out of town. He says he wants to explain why he disappeared. He wants another chance. I've been texting him here and there but there's no way in fuck I'm going to hang out with him. Frickin ass hole.

Doubt it Andy texted me last week to apologize for being a total douche. He wants to be friends. He can eat a dick.

I'd still like to keep my lover relationship going with Stacey. That is until I find someone worth my time. I haven't had sex in over a month. That's a long time for this girl. I kind of like it and will keep it going for a bit.

I started talking to a boy name Jeremy. We met on POF a while back when I was still on there. He saw me online one afternoon and chatted me up. We met on Sunday when I was in the area. He's a lot shorter than I anticipated (he said he was 5'8...I don't think he's 5'8...I'm 5'8). But other than the height thing he's frickin awesome. Has a good job. Owns his own home. Owns his own car. Has tattoos. Used to bmx. Has things he enjoys doing. At the least I've made a new friend with him. I want to take things super slow. I'm going to stop by his house tonight and hang for a few. He asked me to go out with him on Saturday night. Some redneck bar...we'll go make fun of people...should be good times.

Okay this is where my life is.

Oh I forgot to mention the band boy I met while on location. His name is J. He lives in Nashville. He's in a band. I want to bathe him.